Subscribe to RSSWhat an unbalanced world we live in
Despite the major global event of the Olympics kicking off in Beijing, we have another global event going on that couldn’t be any more different from the values and statements of the Olympic Games.
in Georgia, specifically in the South Ossetia and now the Abkhazia regions, a conflict (or even war now, according to the Georgian parliament) is kicking off between Russian Forces (both forces stationed in the aforementioned regions and Russia-based troops) and Georgian troops.
To avoid a huge blog post detailing the history of such a conflict, I’d encourage readers to take read up on the situation before continuing. Despite me linking you to wikipedia, I feel the article is actually pretty well written and accurate.
Whilst the war, I believe, is a matter that should be resolved by all parties involved and not outside influences like the US or Great Britain, I feel that it is important that the International Community takes heed of what is going on.
The major western parties have swiftly moved to show their support for Georgia and condemned the Russian activities as ‘criminal’. They have called on Russia to halt it’s ‘unfair, criminal and disproportionate’ assault on Georgia’s sovereignty. I think it’s important to remember some of the facts here.
- South Ossetians do not want to be part of Georgia and have been pushing for independence form Georgia since 1991.
- There are over 70,000 South Ossetians who have accepted Russian passports, therefore making them de facto Russian citizens.
- Georgia, despite a ceasefire agreement on the 6th August, launched a major assault on the capital city of South Ossetia on the 7th August with unconfirmed reports of casualties.
- Georgia have been accused of targeting civilian amenities in the region, including hospitals in South Ossetia.
Georgia are not smelling of roses right now but since they have close ties with the West, specifically the United States, it’s no wonder that the Bush Administration haven’t condemned their actions as ‘illegal’ or disproportionate towards the South Ossetians.
Enter the Russians. It’s in almost every countries mandate to protect their sovereignty and their citizens. To know that Russian peacekeepers were killed (and allegedy deliberately targeted by Georgians), surely that’s a cause for the Russians to get involved. Moreso, the majority of South Ossetians and Abkhazian’s hold Russian passports, therefore are citizens of Russia, it is within Russia’s mandate to protect them and fight for their liberties.
Whilst it is obvious that the Georgian military is nothing compared to the Russian forces, let’s cast our mind back to when Israel conducted their war with Lebanon about 3 years ago. Not only did Israel completely outnumber the Lebanese, they constantly bombarded them with munitions that the International Community has long since considered illegal. Did the West then come out and label Israel’s actions as ‘disproportionate’ or ‘illegal’? No. They supported them.
People who believe claims for World Peace will lead to something and misguided. Sorry to sound so doom and gloom but how can world peace be achieved when double standards exist throughout the world. Russia and the US have bad enough relations as it is (especially with regards to the Iranian situation) but by the threats that the US have made towards Russia regarding future relations over this conflict, it can only serve to decrease the likelihood that we are going to see a stable and thriving Europe.
Especially when we consider factors such as the US’ proposed ‘Missile Shield’ in the baltic states.
Whoops
I kind of went off the blogging bandwagon there for a week or a week and a half. I’m not entirely sure why because I’m not overly busy and my girlfriend was in Dublin for a few days so I had more time to myself that I normally would and I still kept running out of time to get things done.
I’m not entirely sure why this is happening so I have wracked my brain and come up with only two possible solutions. Either I have a bad habit of procrastination or that I am continually a target for alien abductions.
On to possibly the real reason why I haven’t posted (and actually picking up on a nice segway from the previous paragraph) my time seems to float away aimlessly into the ether whilst I’m revisiting my childhood in the form of retro games. I rediscovered an old favourite of mine, X-Com: UFO Enemy Unknown. This game is pure genius, so much so that I will not even begin to glaze over the topic, were the topic some form of bun. Instead, I will bake a blog post dedicated to this wonderful creation in it’s entirety. Apologies for the bun analogy, but I am hungry.
So, in essence this is yet another post claiming that I’m still here and you oughta keep reading. To whet your little bloggy appetites, I have the following topics in mind for blog posts in the near future:
- X-Com: UFO Enemy Unknown
- The Unsolved Zodiac Murders
- The Hilarious Dimension-Bending Timetables from Translink, Northern Ireland
- And much much more!
But wait, that’s not all! Not only do you get structured blogs to the tune of the above, you also get randomly generated rants (not actually by some random rant generator, but by my brain. Is there a difference? I don’t know.) but also thoughts and what not that I have had over the last few days/weeks/hours.
Enjoy.
Man, it’s a hot one.
Phew, what a scorcher of a day today! Belfast was feeling the heat alright and anyone stuck in a stuffy office block with computers all day will definitely not have had the most enjoyable of days in the sunshine. This is biggest reason why I dislike not being a student anymore, I can’t really just decide to stuff the afternoon’s work, it’s summertime, let’s go get naked. Not that I ever did that, I just decided to let’s go sit in the park. Nakedness is optional.
The weather report, however, stated today’s max would be about 21C. Anyone about would tell you that it definitely seemed a lot warmer than that.
Hold on though, I’m not complaining. I really don’t mind sunny days. However, if you get too warm, the antidote is usually to put a fan on. I have one whirring away right now. A fan of delight and coolness but a fan of deception and treachery. For I know, that as soon as I power down the fan or switch it off that my room will be plunged into a fiery chasm of stuffy warmness that there is no going back from. The only alternative is to never switch the fan off.
Life is tough.
IKEA
I’m just back from a trip to IKEA in Belfast, Northern Ireland. I’m not entirely sure what to think of it. Quite obviously, I’ve thought enough about it to want to make a blog post. But, I’m not going to rant and rave about how it isn’t that cheap or the furniture is poor quality or indeed that you have to build things yourself.
No, not at all! In fact, what I’m going to make is an observation just.
IKEA is full of pregnant women.
There. I said it. It really is though, I went today for two hours and the amount of bumps walking about the place was insane. Obviously, the link is that people are setting up home and with a wee-un on the way, they’ll be looking for bedrooms, updating this, childproofing that etc. but it’s just slightly funny to see all these soon-to-be mummy’s and daddy’s walking about the place.
Mental note, I will never go to IKEA again 
Fat men’s trousers
Probably the most inexplicably silly blog post title I’ve ever made but I was wondering about this today when no doubt I ought to have been doing something more important.
Why do fat men have the stigmata of wearing trousers that fall down on them constantly. Does this stereotypical view come from the idea that a fat guy is buying trousers that are about three sizes too big for him? Why would he do that? Surely he’d struggle to get trousers that actually fit him in the first place.
If anything, I reckon that fat guys trousers are probably too tight on them completely reducing the prospect of them actually falling down.
“But what if the button pops on those slacks?” I hear a small portion of the 4-10 people who read this blog. Well, worry not, for I have an answer. Hypothetical situation. Fat Larry is wearing tight trousers, oh no, the button pops and flies across the room hitting a sixteen year old on their work experience. Is Larry now suffering the embarrassment of his white boxer shorts (with the obligatory red hearts across them) being shown to the room? No. Why? Simply, because the trousers will probably hold their own, given that they are the correct size for Larry, or indeed, too tight for him. In which case, they’ll probably hold their own.
Why must this myth persist? If anything, skinny people’s trousers ought to be falling down more!
More so, if a fat guy’s trousers are falling down then I think we ought to give the guy respect, it’s probably a good indication that they’ve lost weight.
Bond, James Bond
I’ve often wondered what life would be like if your given name really was James Bond. Obviously, before the 1960s this really wouldn’t have been a problem, but let’s say that a James Bond exists (which probability suggests is quite likely), what quality of life would you expect?
Let’s imagine your name is Bond and you’re phoning up to get a credit card or place an order.
“What’s your name, mate?”
“It’s Bond, James Bond.”
“Yeah, pull the other one.”
It’s a naturally instinct sometimes to give our surnames before our forenames. I do it when booking a taxi, for example, or things like that. It must be pretty difficult to be taken seriously for things like that.
This, however, was not the original intention of this blog post. I’ve been watching some excellent James Bond flicks and have finally decided upon the answer to question that everyone asks. Who is the best James Bond. Well, worry no more, because I have answered that question for you.
In order of the least (in my opinion) best James Bond, I present to you the Top Six Bond’s.
Number Six: Roger Moore
Bless Roger, he has such charisma and can deliver the one liners with such panache. What he has in charm and innuendo, he clearly lacks in action and gusto. If I placed Roger Moore in a darker Bond film, like Casino Royale or Licence to Kill, I just can’t see it working. I’d be expecting him to mow down a line of bad guys in a fit of rage only to come out with a hilarious quip afterwards making the ferocity of the previous action null and indeed void.
Number Five: George Lazenby
My apologies to Mr. Lazenby for coming in at fifth, though I think you will find he is often at the bottom of the list of ‘best Bonds’. Unfortunately, we only got to see him in On Her Majesty’s Secret Service, which despite being a thrilling Bond adventure, isn’t a great platform for Mr. Lazenby to wow. Still, could have a good Bond had he been given a better run.
Number Four: Pierce Brosnan
Obviously, at this stage, you’ll deduce that Timothy Dalton has yet to make the list. Brosnan was supposed to be Roger Moore’s successor as James Bond and do the films that Dalton made his own (The Living Daylights and License to Kill). Alas, due to Brosnan’s filming schedule with a TV show, this was not to be. A blessing in disguise. Very much Roger Moore-esque, Brosnan has the charm and charisma in unbelievable amounts. He is better at the silly action than Moore but lacks the nitty gritty ability to become a cold hearted killer. Not a bad outing as Bond though for Mr. Brosnan who we will surely all forgive for Mamma Mia, right?
Number Three: Daniel Craig
This was a difficult choice for me. The first time I saw Casino Royale, I did not think Craig performed well as Bond. However, as I emerged myself more in the world of James Bond, I realised that this is exactly how Bond was as a younger agent - some these traits even lend themselves to later events in Bond’s life. Craig is suave, not as handsome perhaps as Bros..all the over Bonds…but he has the ability to be suave, charismatic and a cold hearted assassin. With only one crack at the shell of James Bond under his belt, Craig has brought the dark side of Bond to the screen and I am thankful for that. I anticipate his performance in Quantum of Solace.
Number Two: Sean Connery
Need I actually say any more about Sean Connery? He was the first cinematic Bond and therefore has got to be one of the better. Thankfully for Connery, it is more than nostalgia that ranks him quite highly in my books (which, of course, I am sure Sean Connery is ever so grateful for). He again is excellent at the charismatic Bond or whipping out his innuendos. That being said, he is also is capable of going on a mean killing streak and not ending it with some witty quip.
Number One: Timothy Dalton
Amongst Bond aficionados, this decision will probably not go down well. Hopefully though, Bond aficionados will not be reading this article. I’m not 100% sure how to describe Dalton’s performances as Bond. I think he has got the charisma and charm of Roger Moore, the dark angry streaks of Daniel Craig and the handsome rugged looks of Sean Connery or Pierce Brosnan. More importantly, I recall Dalton being the only Bond to wear a knitted sweater, which would of course lure you into a false sense of security. Beware.
The iPhone-y
Oh, look at my post title, I’m ever so witty.
So, I’m probably the only nerd with a habit of disliking anything popular and craze-esque who hasn’t yet ranted about the iPhone. Seeing how last Friday, the iPhone 3G was released, I figured it was entirely appropriate to finally vent my feelings concerning this technological wonder.
Trash. Pure trash. Whilst the potential for Apple fan boys and girls is huge (in terms of monetizing them), Apple still seem to have a rather pretentious following. Admittedly, this is a slight deviation but I’d be curious to know how many male Apple users (with respect to personal computers) also have curly hair and drink Magners whilst watching a foreign film (So as not to alienate anyone reading this, you must tick all 3 of the aforementioned criteria for me to greatly dislike you).
Given Apple’s cult success (and glaringly blatant shortcomings), it was only natural that they’re release another cash cow device for the masses to drool over.
Shock. I was actually reasonably impressed by the iPhone after a colleague in one of my many previous jobs showed it to me. It does look sleek, it does look nifty and it has a nice screen. Then again, my Samsung mobile phone looks sleek nifty and has a really nice screen and has a retail value of considerably less than the iPhone.
That aside, I had no real issues with the iPhone. Yes, it was locked to networks, yes it had software glitches; neither of these two points came as a real surprise to me given Apple’s track record for ‘keeping things in the family’ยน especially when their iPod was considered. However, the realisation that the iPhone only worked on a 2G network was somewhat of a shocker. Here I am waltzing around with my Samsung something-or-other (I genuinely cannot remember the model) with not only 3G network capabilities but HSDPA (as close as we’ll get to mobile download speeds) and a 3.0 megapixel camera. The original iPhone did not even come close to this.
I think it’s a disgrace that the iPhone didn’t launch originally with all the bells and whistles. They’ve brought out the 3G version now and if I had bought the original iPhone I’d feel somewhat betrayed that I’d have to fork out another hundred quid or so to get a phone that works with a better speed, a speed that almost all modern devices currently work at for a lot less.
So, despite my normal disliking of Apple, I was willing to give the iPhone a chance (not to extent of buying one though) and not actually hate it. But I had no idea it wasn’t 3G and had no idea it only had a 2.0 Megapixel camera nor did it work at HSDPA download speeds.
So yeah, I feel better now that I’ve ranted about the iPhone but really, it just seems like a big iPhony (I’m sorry, I did love that pun too much) and a usual i-insertWordHere device to appeal to the more upper-class market that Apple seems to target.
What’s wrong with using a good old Nokia or Ericsson?
Important News
Well, today has been a seemingly slow news day, if you were to go by what the People want to see. Before I sound all preachy and pretentious here, let me first of all say I haven’t really watched the news either today so consider this a non-critical comment, just something I’ve noticed. Let’s, for the sake of argument, assume that what I’m going to talk about is a middle-aged woman getting changed in front of her window and I’m a prepubescent boy with a new telescope for my birthday.
As we can see, more of the ‘lighter’ or ‘whimsical’ news stories are the ones most distributed. The most read category and identical set of stories (at time of writing, not this post but this sentence, which is 10:44pm GMT). So essentially, the hottest news today is that a fat lamb likes to lie on a sofa, a gay bishop was heckled, twat ‘Banksy’ may be revealed but we’ll never know as he’s never going to come out, much to the disappointment of the gay bishop, a referee was drunk and you’re not allowed to pop your clogs in the freezing cold.
In reality, some of today’s proper news stories:
There’s quite a lot of news going on there, enough to keep BBC News 24 presenters actually doing something other than showing live pictures of something only somewhat slightly relevant to whatever news story they were covering. So, let’s see, we’ve got a prisoner exchange between Israel and Hezbollah, that must be a good milestone, Pakistani soldiers being killed by militants, that’s important news, stabbings in festivals and a victim of knife crime being named.
All in all, quite a filled sandwich of news. Again, not that I’m suggested we all ought to be tuned into the news 24 hours a day and keep abreast of what’s happening. I’ll be honest, I don’t give a hoot about 99% of the stories above anyway.
But is it possible that people tune into the news just for those ‘And finally…’ moments where a cat got stuck up a tree and the fire engine sent to rescue it got stuck down a well on it’s way there? Why not make two versions of the news, The Serious News and The Silly News? I wonder what will get more ratings. Hmmmm.
